10 things inside my wife’s purse

My wife’s purse is basically like a Rite Aid. She’s got essential knick-knacks, but also some unusual trinkets, which raised some eyebrows and peaked our curiosity this past weekend. My kids pulled out 10 items from her purse while I tried to figure out why she carries them around. The following items are ranked in order of necessity to Scooby-doo-mysterious.

1. Snacks – Two bags of Goldfish to prevent meltdowns. Smart.

2. More snacks – Organic fruit roll ups and gummy bears. This will totally keep them busy, no question.

3. Sunscreen – A mini bottle of SPF 45 so this California sunshine doesn’t burn their soft baby skin. I agree, a definite must.

4. Hand sanitizer – Good call here. This will absolutely come in handy when the baby decides to play with street trash.

5. Extra diapers and wipes – Yup, we always need these for disasters so I’m glad you’re always thinking ahead by packing backups here.

6. One sunglasses lens – Where did the rest of the sunglasses go? Did one of our kids hulk smash your frames? If yes, I know this feeling. RIP to your sunnies, gurl.

7. An entire banana – I know you’re probably well aware of it, but what would have happened if you forget about this over the weekend? Risky decision here, but I’ll allow it.

8. One shoelace – does this mean one of our kids is running around right now with a shoe that is missing a shoelace? That doesn’t seem safe, but whatever, let’s move on…

9. Masking tape – So is this here in case we need to wrap a christmas present in August?

10. A bird feather – a quill for your signature, I presume? Did you pluck this yourself from a duck’s butt? I’m assuming this was a surprise gift from one of our children so I’m glad you have number 4 and 5 to help mitigate this situation.

Ps. I went ahead and put an entire bottle of Pinot in your purse just in case there is an actual bird inside one of your pockets. Good luck, Mommy!


Tell us about the weird stuff your partner carries in their purse, bag, or wallet in the comments below!  And be sure to follow the shenanigans on FacebookInstagram, and Pinterest. You can email me directly to say hello too!

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