The Great Chicken Debate

“Daddy, tell me about our farm again…”

It’s no secret that my dream has always been to own and live on a farm. And now, when I put my daughter down to sleep at night, it’s become our dream. She closes her eyes knowing that one day we’re going to ride horses, run through blueberry plants, and go swimming in our lake. Everyone on our farm has a job: she’ll collect the eggs, Mommy picks the fruits, the Grandma’s feed the goats, and I milk the cows. Then, we all sit down for breakfast. Honestly, it’s really a damn-good dream.

When we bought our house, I looked at the patch of grass leading up to the tool shed, and immediately saw my dream becoming a reality. I pointed to my wife and proclaimed, “This is where the chickens will roam free!”

“There will never be any chickens in our house,” she replied.

Pardon?” I said politely. “Don’t you know about our dream?”

“Get a better dream.” she answered.

+++

She immediately shot down any conversation about a backyard farm. As much as I pleaded, she spit-fired 10 concerns about my “dumb chicken idea”. Here was/is her list:

  1. Focus on getting a real job instead so we can pay the mortgage.
  2. You are not a farmer.
  3. Chickens are dirty.
  4. We have babies and chickens carry diseases.
  5. Chickens are dangerous and can poke your eyes out.
  6. We have cats and racoons in the neighborhood.
  7. Have you even heard what a chicken sounds like? They are loud.
  8. Who’s going to clean the coup? You?
  9. What are you going to feed the chickens? Have you thought about these types of logistics? Do you ever think about logistics!?
  10. After they stop producing eggs, what do we do with the chickens?

Here was my list back at her:

  1. DO YOU EVEN EAT EGGS, BRO?

So as you can see, my farm-dream is currently stalled. So if you have a thriving backyard farm, I am jealous. Second, I also need your help convincing my wife it’s a good idea to start one. Comment back with ideas and help me build a better list!


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8 comments

  1. This argument is with your wife? You lose no matter what list you come up with. Only way is to inception her into thinking she wants this herself. 😛

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